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We did discuss getting a chick down here, but can you imagine? We'd have to tidy up, empty the chemical toilet more than once a year, do some cleaning and listen to 'their day'. So we've agreed that we're better off without an actual woman down here. There are disadvantages of course, but we've solved this by allocating personal time on the chemical toilet. And that seems to be working and we have the advantage of drinking beer in our underpants and talking marketing without a woman huffing the whole time.

Dany wants to know if his London Lotus Originals store has opened yet? He kinda needs some more Lotus Originals Y-fronts, you see.

Ferrari called. Apparently, they laughed a lot and then put the phone down. Dany wasn't amused.

The APX was actually the secret test mule to the now scrapped Enorm, apparently. Although, Dany says that they were planning a slightly more interesting colour and more rocket pods.

Dany says all those of you (who are still reading this thread and haven't moved onto the newer, more grown up one that's just been started that he isn't going to read on principle) who doubts his awesomeness should go to the Goodwood Festival of Speed. Then you'll see just how flippin fantastic Dany's marketing mind really is. He's sworn me to secrecy, but it does sound pretty good. Dany knows His Earlness the Duke of Lord March, so he's going on Thursday, incognito. He's also going to pick up some Lotus Originals Y-fronts while he's there (if the more exlusive London store hasn't opened by then) and set fire to the Ferrari stand.

Well, now let's see. Dany says that there was a plan to rename the Redbull Air Race, to 'You don't have to be stupid, but... Air Race'. Then they considered 'Who would do this... Air Race' but they finally agreed on 'Air Miles for Dany Air Race', but then Dany left, so they canned the whole rebranding thing. New cars included the Enorm and three wheeler already exclusively brought to you. Other than that, there was a plan for a premium lifestyle exclusive luxury submarine Elise until Dany found out that someone had already done that, which annoyed him. Was that it? I can't remember.

Gotta go; Dany needs the IPad to send out more hate mail to various motoring industry journalists.

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Whatever keeps the ship afloat, I wouldn't buy a Lotus Cayenne, but then I wouldn't buy a Landrover Evoque either, but there's a big market out there and you just know Lotus could do a great job.

One reason I hate Porsche so much (in a 'they are so good, damn them' sort of way) is that rather than look down their noses at the SUV market, they realised they could make obscene amounts of money transporting their brand into that space. They realised that SUVs are basically what people who want sportscars choose instead when they need to ship the family around, so why not take 60-90k off them for the privilege?

In a way, the SUV has been a godsend for car manufacturers. Sure, it costs a bit more to assemble all that extra metal and plastic, but then you can charge a 20-30% premium over an 'ordinary' car that actually does precisely the same job for 99.999% of the owners of such vehicles.

In a way (this is going to sound a bit harsh), it's a bit like the sportscar market, where 99% of the time, super-speedy cars are doing nothing other than bimbling around town.

For many owners in both camps, it's the idea of knowing your car 'could' do this extra stuff. That's why they'll shell out the extra money for these exotic vehicles - be it a new Esprit or a new Cayenne.

If Lotus were building an SUV right now, it would be a good thing, because it would indicate that they're basically fixed as a company. That they can't do one right now is just the reality of being so far behind the curve and needing to catch up.

Good luck!

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C'mon, where should Lotus get the money to develop an SUV? Remember, the Cayenne was sponsored by VW, who call the same vehicle Tuareg. The Audi Q7 is a further derivative of the same chassis, as will be the Lamboughini SUV.

Won't happen unless Lotus is sold to one of the big boys.

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The APX was actually the secret test mule to the now scrapped Enorm, apparently. Although, Dany says that they were planning a slightly more interesting colour and more rocket pods.

Soon to be followed by the Enorm S, undoubtedly. Did I steal someone's joke. :harhar:

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Actually, Lotus Engineering has quite a bit of experience in this market and did a proof of concept exercise where they took 38% of the weight off of a Toyota Venza crossover for only 3% of the cost.

That's incredible.

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Lotus and SUV's? Porsche has always had a working partnership with VW. That relationship enabled them to amortise costs on many models over several decades.

Lotus doesn't seem to have had similar extensive benefits from the manufacturers it's been associated with over the years.

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"Soon to be followed by the Enorm S..."

I_see_what_you_did_there_super.jpg

funnycartoon57.jpg

(As a Sequoia owner, I can relate.)

:cry:

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Enorm S! Ha ha, that's hilarious! I so hadn't got to that yet.

First time Dany has genuinely laughed since he's been down here. Clearly the marketing department hadn't worked the full range of Enorms through. They'd only got up to the Enorm T, and the Enorm S-P. Soooo, childish, no wonder there's a break away thread for grown ups.

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"Grown ups? Seen them...don't want to end up like that!!"

A quote from my old chum Bonzo....and, so far, we haven't.

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Perhaps you'd be better illustrating what you're thinking with a picture Darryl? :lol:

Bugger, that was close thought I'd be visiting the local sex shop for some under counter magazines to scan a picture or two; thankfully Suddabym has explained the "use of the toilet" for own pleasures???

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Actually, you can get quite a range of those sorts of pictures online, Darryl.

Apparently.

According to Dany, that is. He's knows lots about online stuff. It's great for marketing apparently.

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This is entirely true. I can exclusively reveal that Dany is indeed planning to sue.

Apparently, he called up a Judge who he knows (who coincidentally, is driving around the High Courts in a nearly new Evora) and asked him if he could sue. The Judge said he could provided that he could prove that he didn't nick the petty cash tin. Dany said he could definitely prove that cos earlier that day he'd used all the petty cash to get Fortnam and Mason to restock his private jet with jellied oysters and guava halves. The Judge said that in that case he could definitely sue and he was sure it would probably go really well for him. A bit like when Dany sued Tony, the Judge said. Dany didn't find that very amusing. But Dany said that he would definitely win cos he's a marketing mammoth amoungst mice and he would use mesmerising powers of communication and a new hair style to cow the Hicom pansies into stunned silence. He says Hicom are all girls.

And he's not responding to emails cos the police were round earlier and warned him to stop sending hate mail to the motoring press. So I've banned him from the iPad.

The tobogganing didn't go so well. Dany got stuck behind the U-bend for three hours. In the end I had to baste him with his own hair mousse and work him free. It wasn't pretty, so we've binned that now.

After Dany has sued and been given the Lotus Origninals stores as compo, he's planning to set himself up as 'Lotus Design' and design stuff using his marketing epicness.

Awesome.

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DB has always a way to make things even worse! Lotus has been involved in so many lawsuits since he's joined that I've lost track how many!

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Having been 'sacked' he's got no choice but to sue to save face. He'll struggle to work again. I'm sure most people would defend their competence if push came to shove.

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This is messy, totally avoidable and a major error of judgement made by the new bosses. It would've been far better to have eased him out with a nice pay off, all done quietly behind doors. There's be no winners here except the lawyers... again!

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I'm sure most people would defend their competence if push came to shove.

Or try and hide their incompetance.

Like its been said above, DB seems to enjoy paying lawyers. I can't believe DRB would have done what they did without checking the legal ramifications first. At least we will hear all the evidence of it all, which has been kept a secret up to now.

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How is sueing your employer for wrongful dismissal a way to hide incompetence? :huh:

If he'd been incompetent, he'd not want his actions dragged into public court, he'd stay in the bunker tobogganing and being a marketing simian.

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You sure he would want to go to court of just settle (perhaps he is keen to protect his royalty on sale of Lotus if and when). Never saw a glowing report from either Red Bull or Ferrari after he left

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This is messy, totally avoidable and a major error of judgement made by the new bosses. It would've been far better to have eased him out with a nice pay off, all done quietly behind doors. There's be no winners here except the lawyers... again!

Well said! Its frightening to see how unprofessional DRB has handled the whole transition. How much Lotus shareholder value have they acutally destroyed in the last months?

Edited by TBD

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Well said! Its frightening to see how unprofessional DRB has handled the whole transition. How much Lotus shareholder value have they acutally destroyed in the last months?

Maybe as much as Dany boy pissed away on racing decals and Hollywood parties! :devil:

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We can't really say if DRB have been unprofessional. It's not like they are simply buying a corner deli. They purchased a multi-faceted automotive company that has its hand in quite a few businesses. There would be multiple audits to follow to ascertain viability etc.

As a result of that, the accounts guy threw in the towel and DB got shown the door. Interestingly, there has not been a peep from the accounts guy that seems to have made the news. Want to bet he shows up in court for DRB?

For them to have been so public about it and not go the way of a payout, I would think they have to have very good reason.

It's a huge gamble otherwise.

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In the Lotus camp ,so many changes in such a short space in time (2 and a half years)

So many new faces ,additional responsible people and furthermore a new company buyout (DRB)

To prove incompetence would be an extremely tall order.Whilst there are standards of operating (naturally bean practice) ..it appears as if DRB have used the terminology in it's "blanket form" In their opinion this would cover all areas and on the surface would make for an easy case...............wrong ,wrong ,wrong ! Strike one against DRB

never ,ever attempt a lawsuit/potential lawsuit in terms of employment in a vast term.

To go public and say that DB is suspended ,followed by inuendo's of money spending bla bla bla ....sacks of gross unprofessional behaviour .Where there is smoke ,there is fire .....someone was out to get DB and the reason is internally a political battle takes place ,propagates and eventually one does not see clearly who the friend or foe is .In this instance ,i am convinced that DB was not the flavour (amongst many in DRB) and they made a mountain out of a mole hill.Strike two

The bosses at DRB are by now so convinced that kicking his ass and slating him would show DRB to be a upstanding ,no nonsense company that will provide security to all and sundry.......obviously you have to be in favour for this to happen and we all know that DB has a large ,albeit soft vocabulary about anything and everything ....that is his forte' (and this is not intended as sarcasm)

So eventually ,after much playing around and planning and "if this comes out ,i never said anything" in the DRB camp ,DB is fired and dragged through town with more tar and feathers than Liza Minelli's coat ......Strike three

AND THEY EXPECTED THAT THE MAN WOULD WALK AND SAY SORRY ....!!

A contraversial figure DB is yes ,,,, but not a criminal or coward .They (DRB) deserve a solid kick in the nuts ......

Soon the DRB will stand for Dany Ruddy Bahar

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