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Fizz, eh? I find expensive champers very disappointing these days...perhaps my conspicuous consumption of Taittinger Blanc de Blanc 76 spoilt my palate...that was like angels peeing on your tongue...so my system is to go to a French Supermarket and buy the cheapest genuine brut champagne they have. Never let me down, always toothsome and around £9 a bottle. And the exchange rate is on your sode a bit more these days....

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Well, I asked Dany but he didn't understand the question at first. He simply said, 'ask for it, dumass'. Then I explained that most other people have to pay for stuff and he suggested you do what he does - put it on expenses, obviously! Dumass.

He also mentioned that Morrisons are doing Bolly for £30. And let's face it, if you're entertaining people that you don't really like all that much and don't want to waste something half-decent like Krug on them, then Bolly really is your only other option.

By the way, if you want to ask him for any other advice, he's just got a new job, which he's very excited about. He's working two afternoons a week in the London Lotus Originals Store, Underpants Department. Otherwise, you'll find him down here rearranging the personal grooming corner of the survival equipment section of the post-apocalypse stores hangar.

Right, Dany back to bailing out the sunken massage and tanning booth, big boy. And put some trousers on, this time!

Awesome!

Or, for fifteen cases (flippin eck! What are you going to do, swim in it!) Dany says you could give them a car from the car company that you're the CEO of. Worked for him. Well, mostly.

Or buy a vineyard. That also worked for him.

Or, buy Morrisons. Or France. Not sure which is the worst.

Or, buy Cava and change the labels.

Dany also mentioned that you could sell the yacht, or chin off one of the mistresses and sell her Monaco apartment.

Asked the director in charge of fleet regarding "free" company cars he said i'll be asking for free helicopters next, hope he wasent implying anything???

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Dany says just make sure you've got an imaginative accounts department and it's jet planes, minor celebs, the lot.

Apparently, that's where he went wrong, apparently.

Also, if you have any of the fifteen cases left, can we have it? We're running critically short of Bolly, cos Dany keeps doing his hair in it.

Awesome.

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That's a sad sight. That car is a significant piece of Esprit history and features in several books. I'm surprised it wasn't sold off in the Lotus car auction a few years ago, where it could have gone to a good home.

Edited by Mark B

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That's a sad sight. That car is a significant piece of Esprit history and features in several books. I'm surprised it wasn't sold off in the Lotus car auction a few years ago, where it could have gone to a good home.

TBH the car did not look like it had been stood there that long, perhaps SID is still being used for evaluation purposes

Bibs do you recall the car being dormant all those years and parked up?

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SID was originally in the (Coys) auction to be sold off along with all the rest of the Lotus history c15 years ago (I was planning to bid for it) but it was withdrawn at the 11th hour.

Over the years I've seen it in various parts of the factory but was sitting out where PH found it last January. I spoke with Brian Angus who talked very fondly of it saying that it had been used many times over the years to test developments

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So what's happened to Dany's old Esprit? Did that sell.... has anyone even heard the price?

You need to get your sealed bid in by 11th Sept

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http://sniffpetrol.com/2013/03/13/an-update-from-dany-bahaha/

 

Hello believers.

BaharPremierInn.jpgYou have not heard from me for a while. Do not be alarmed. Everything is under control. Naturally, after this period of deliberately minimalist communication you will have some questions. Is The Plan still in place? Does The Bahaha Excellence Automotive Premium Lifestyle Excellentiness Group still operate from room 231 of the Premier Inn at Norwich Airport? Did I, Dany Bahaha, invent scissors? The answer to all of these questions is, yes.

As you may recall, the foul unbelievers at Lotus sought to deny the world the genius of The Plan. They also said some unkind things about my hair. However, I can assure you they underestimated Dany Bahaha and they underestimated my ability to launch six brand new premium excellence lifestyle aspirational heritage brand excellence optimal excellence sports cars all at once. I am capable of this, just as I was capable of writing the song Yesterday. I also played drums on it.

There has been good progress on The Plan. However, that progress is now stalled by funding issues that I am working to resolve. If only the fools at Lotus would give me the money I deserve all would be well. Instead, they refuse to honour this transaction and have told me I am ‘full of shit’. It is to be expected. The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. You might remember those words from the film Pulp Fiction. I wrote that. It is originally a quote from The Bible. I wrote that too.

My loyal friends, I need you to help me whilst the vile infidels at Lotus continue to undermine me at every turn and say my hair makes me look like ‘a well kept lesbian’. The financial situation at Bahaha Excellence Automotive Aspirational Lifestyle Heritage Premiumosity Group is in a state of flux and needs some temporary cashflow to ensure smooth running. Without this, Jan the duty manager (Mondays to Thursdays although she sometimes covers Sundays too) says she cannot allow me to remain on the premises. Do not disappoint me, true believers. In return for your donations I will personally arrange for Mickey Rourke and Brian May to come to your house. They are my friends. Friends do not need to return calls.

Keep drinking the Kool-Aid.

L. Ron Bahaha

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Ever since Dany escaped the Bunker by hiding in the chemical toilet, I have missed him. I still don't know what to do with the 17 family jars of Vaseline he left behind. Bless that awesome guy. I still have his leopard-skin underpants. Framed. In my Baharthroom. Along with the Vaseline.

It is so good to hear from him. I'll bet he is still completely epic.

Wadda guy.

D'you think we should organise a collection? He did build 6 new Lotus cars, that looked like Lotus cars and really nearly were Lotus cars except for not being Lotus cars, of course. I heard he was going to build a 7th Lotus car, that wasn't actually a Lotus car, but he decided to rest instead.

And, have you seen his baby seal-leather slippers? I mean, come on, we have to do something. They don't grow, on, er trees, you know.

Dany - man, I miss that guy.

Awesome.

Sudders

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Well I know I certainly will be.

Awesome.

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Bloody Hilarious Bibs, thanks for that!

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Is it true he had bought a helicopter Lotus have only just found out about?...oh and a flat in Mayfair?

 

Buddsy

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Ok I just heard Norwich airport wanted to be paid for the rent for the helicopter they got parked there. Must be Chinese whispers?

 

But good news I hear all suppliers have now been paid going back to September so that's good news!

 

Buddsy

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The helicopters he flew in were based out of Long Stratton, and there are no outstanding bills. 

 

The still owe me my one single expense claim I've ever made to them from Oct '11! 

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David St. Hubbins: "It`s such a fine line between stupid and uh....."

 

Nigel Tufnel :  "clever"

 

David St. Hubbins :"Yeah, and clever"

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I think you'll find there was an outstanding bill for a private plane to be parked at Norwich Airport.

 

Whether it's been paid or not I don't know.

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